Pageant Scene- Beth

Pageant Scene

Nicole- Pageant Girl No.1

Liberty- Pageant Girl No. 2

Ellie- Sarah

Beth- Presenter

After just being pushed onto the stage Sarah finds herself in the middle of a beauty pageant. Nicole, Ellie and Liberty stand in a row.

Ellie: [looks scared and shocked as she bumps into pageant girl no. 1]

Pageant Girl No. 1: Watch it!

Presenter: Okay, so that was our lovely lady number 1. And now for contestant number 2. [Nicole and Liberty begin to show off Ellie as if she is a product] Weighing in at 8st3;a slightly heavier weight than contestant number 1 [Ellie gasps, looking annoyed, whilst Nicole and Liberty hold Ellie's waist, turning her to the side to show off her stomach]. At a taller than average height, you men are going to need a pair of heels to match this woman, at 5ft7, she's a bit of a beast. None the less gentlemen, if you are a boob man look away now [Turn Ellie to show off boobs]. If this constants boobs were a battery size they'd be AAA. Equally, if you are a bum man, look away now. [Turn Ellie to show off bum]

So thank you contestant number 2, would you like to say a bit about yourself?

Ellie: Erm, well [laughs] I'm Sarah [gets cut off by presenter]

Presenter: Okay, so contestant number 2, tell us, what hobbies do you have?

Ellie: [in an intellectual voice with upright, lady-like posture] Well, sometimes I just read the dictionary for fun and I often like to play chess

Presenter and Pageant Girls [Shocked and confused]

Ellie: [Coughs, normal voice and posture again] Erm, sorry, I mean I like to fake tan. I love TOWIE [in a quieter voice] that actually stands for the Only Way Is Essex you know! And I love drinking

Presenter: Hmm, thought so. And what would you change about your body if you could?

Ellie: Definitely my face, I'm just so spotty

Presenter: Yeah, you definitely are. So contestant number 2, if you could change the world, what would you do, and more importantly, what would you do for women?

Nicole and Liberty physically change bending over to become table. Ellie now changes to a strong, bold woman in a election

Ellie: If I could change the world, women will no longer be slaves! Women will stand tall amongst men, with the right to work, the right to vote, the right to be heard! Women will have a voice and we will be heard! [Change back to pageant, Ellie change back to 'normal' Sarah] Well, if I was in power, I would definitely make sure all women get laid on a night out, free fake tans for everyone, and the right to boobs jobs for those with my condition!

Presenter: [sarcastically claps] Thank you. So now we'll start the bidding at £5 [speaking directly to audience. Nicole and Liberty now become men bidding for Ellie. With their backs to the audience with an exaggerated male posture] do I here more than £5?

For contestant number 2, can I get £10? Anyone? £10? You sir, anything?

Liberty: I'll give you £20, for this woman.

Presenter: £20! Do I hear anymore than £20? No....going...gone. Sold to the gentleman in the front! Come and collect your prize.

This scene leads on to date scene with Ellie